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Sick as a dog

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My brother called me a few days ago and said, “I have a small blog for you to write.” I tried to type the story as he told it, but he talks really fast. So this isn’t verbatim.

A few months ago, someone gave Justin and Carrie a few giant containers of meatballs and rigatoni. The containers got pushed to the back of their refrigerator and forgotten. A few days ago, Carrie decided that they probably weren’t good anymore, so she threw them away. The bag of trash made it to the door but not quite out the door before they went to dinner.

They came home to a mess and a bloated, unhappy dog. Jack had gotten into the trash bag and eaten the giant box of months-old meatballs and half the box of rigatoni. In addition to being hugely bloated, Justin said, Jack was “lackadaisical” and wanted to do nothing but cuddle.

They were concerned. There was talk of taking Jack to the vet. Before they did that, though, Justin thought they should try to make him throw up. This is where the story “goes to the Google,” as Justin says. The first recommendation he found said to put a teaspoon of salt on the back of the dog’s tongue. Jack ate the salt. He made an awful face, but he ate it.

Justin does not recommend using salt.

The next Google suggestion suggested giving the dog 2 teaspoons of 3% hydrogen peroxide — the stuff that comes in a brown bottle. The writer strongly recommended doing this outside.

Within 30 seconds, Justin said, Jack was “in the grass, puking like he’s never puked before.” He was no longer bloated, and he was back to his normal, happy self.

The moral of the story is this: If you need to make a dog throw up, use peroxide.