My hometown library was just across the street from the high school, and it was where my friends and I hung out after school before we could drive ourselves off to places better suited for making trouble. The library was marvelous, and we were living in an Arcade Fire song. There were a few record players — complete with gargantuan headphones — in the center of the main room, to the left of the circulation desk. That’s where Rockford spent most of his time. Just beyond the turntables was the “young adult” section. If I remember correctly, it was a pair of blue armchairs next to a few rotating racks of paperbacks.

(The town where we grew up moved the library a few years ago, and I feel so sorry for the carless young nerds today who don’t know the joy of walking across the road to hang out at the library. Poor little things.)

Anyway, one day a number of us youthful nerdlings were hanging out at the library. Rockford was most likely listening to albums, a few people were probably sitting in those chairs back by the paperbacks, and I’m sure someone was perusing the latest copy of “Rolling Stone” over in the periodicals section. But it was yours truly who found gold that day. Solid gold.

Friends, our library had a book all about how to do The Hustle.

(I hope you’re whistling to yourself now. I know I am.)

The nerd-types gathered around, and we laughed and laughed, and much fun was made of those earnest purveyors of disco. And then I checked the book out, took it home, and tried to learn to do The Hustle. Did you know that you cannot learn to dance from a book? Well, maybe you can. I, however, cannot learn to dance from a book.

That was the only run-in I’ve had with trying to learn how to dance. Many years later, I put “Learn to dance” on my Mighty List, and then I ignored it for a good long while. And then! On Monday night, I went to a ballroom dancing class with a friend. And we did The Hustle. I think. The instructor called it the nightclub merengue, but then he let it slip that it was also known as The Hustle if one danced to a disco beat. Which I do.

My first dance partner looked a lot like this guy. It doesn’t get more awesome than doing The Hustle with that guy. (Unless you’re doing The Hustle with Rockford. I’m guessing that would be more awesome. Everything’s more awesome with Rockford. I’m trying to convince him to sign up.)